@KateWhineHall: I just shaved my legs. I think I lost three pounds.
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@Izianikapani: "Just dashing to the shops" Woman [showers, washes hair, styles hair, puts on make up, chooses outfit, irons clothes] Man [grabs car keys]
@TheTweetOfGod: "I want my country back" is a fair and accurate thing to say if at one point in your life you owned the country.
@polksalad: Just found out my cat lied about being pregnant just to try and save our relationship and cover up for getting fat.
@mickeza1: You have 90,000 followers, follow 92,000, and all you tweet are @s thanking people for following back. Are you raising an army for Mordor?