@BlondAmbitionTO: I just shook my keyboard upside down. Breakfast is served.
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@LeviKabwato: Nephew drops my iPad, doesn't say sorry but proceeds to offer me a biscuit. His future in Politics is secure.
@dxblarssonENG: Top three reasons he doesn't text you back: 1. He's just not that into you 2. He's imaginary 3. He's a cat
@2sassymom: Me: Whatcha doin? 7: a stupid math paper Me: why stupid? 7: Sally has 3,000 pennies; really Sally? Get a debit card!