@ElKnuckelhombre: I just spent ten minutes waving back to a guy in a storefront window before I realized he was just cleaning the glass.
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@PerfectPending: Spoiler alert: The fairytale ends with the prince at work, 3 whiney kids, and you are cinderella AND the wicked witch.
@iAmDelFreaky: I just opened an Easy Bake Oven restaurant. Please call your order in, 17 hours prior to your arrival.
@JermHimselfish: *takes a home pregnancy test* *finds out home is pregnant* *calls a carpenter to find out if it's gonna be a shed or a gazebo*