@TheRolo: I just spilled my last beer while reaching over to hit "ignore caller" on my phone. Why do bad things happen to good people?
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: 🎶 You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why. Life gets worse when you're an adult. 🎶
@ElgatoEsmio: SOME DUDE IN A LAB IS WORKING ON BRINGING THE PTERODACTYL BACK TO LIFE SO ENJOY THOSE EVENING STROLLS WHILE YOU CAN!
@LivibelsDada: You know you're too drunk to drive when you swerve to miss a tree then realise it was your air freshener.