@OldsDad: I just threw a snowball at a Smart car and its airbags deployed
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@better_off_dad: *At the bank Robber:THIS IS A STICKUP! Me:Looks like a gun R:SHUT UP! M:Well, 'THIS IS A GUN' is way scarier Teller:He's got a point
@crunchenhanced: [In cubicle at work] *pretends to start clipping my nails* *tosses uncooked grains of rice onto co-workers desk with each clip* CW: WTF!
@PaulyPeligroso: To spice things up in the bedroom, I have my wife dress up as a pizza boy. Then, I have her put the pizza on the counter and then leave.
@better_off_dad: God: I made the sky a canvas, the sun & the clouds an ever changing painting of colorful beauty. Devil: I made potato chips.