@dinnersruined: I just want a girl that's nice and sweet that doesn't require a lot of money and I can dunk them in milk wait, a cookie, I want a cookie
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@Brianhopecomedy: My wife is going to the hair salon today so for the next few hours I will be practising my reaction.
@TheJamieLee: My Starbucks guy just said, "Looks like you had a rough night!" ...I didn't even go out.
@Amburglar_: Sochi is doing that thing where they manically try to clean the house 10 minutes before company arrives. But the house is Russia.