@just1fool: I just want to make you hot. Mess your hair up. Get your blood flowing. When I chase you around the house over the last piece of pizza.
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@ericsshadow: My son is so lazy he's went from playing video games on the computer to watching other people play video games on the computer.
@BiIIMurray: I read that burglars use Twitter & Facebook to see when people arent home. So from now on, Im at home. With a rifle. And a hungry crocodile.
@BestScienceJoke: The U.S. has more prisons than degree-granting colleges. How absurd. To fix that, we should merge some prisons and split up some colleges.
@PaulyPeligroso: 90 years from now, they'll sing songs about the courage and bravery you displayed during the great "Instagram Selling Your Photos" skirmish.