@DannyZuker: I just watched a 15 year old girl who was busy texting walk into a light post and I am no longer an atheist.
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@jonnysun: i did it God! i finaly got 2 of evry animal ＮＯＡＨ．ＴＨＥＹ ＨＡＶＥ ＴＯ ＢＥ ＡＬＩＶＥ *noah looks at boat full of dead animals* do u kno how long this took
@causticbob: I've been attending Acronym Anonymous meetings recently. Or as I like to call it AA. I'm not making a lot of progress.
@SmithWit: Be thankful for Twitter. The way gas prices are headed, we're never going to meet real people ever again.