@SarcasticAlly12: I keep a tiny vial of gluten in my pocket in case I ever need to smash it on the ground to make a getaway from a large group of hipsters
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@Sean_Burgundy_: Loan shark: If you're late my guys will ... Me: Tell my gf my phone password? LS: Break every bone in your body M: Oh. Yeah that's fine
@TheDairylandDon: Did you ever see someone yawn, and then yawn yourself? That psychological reaction is a phenomenon known as: "Katherine Heigl movies."