@13spencer: I keep having to remind myself that an "oral history" is not nearly as exciting as it sounds.
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@GABBYdaAngSaya: [After reading vows] Me: Why are you upset? Her: Me: Was it the Donald- Her: Yes, it was the Donald Duck voice.
@OBiiieeee: a girl took a grilled cheese out of her purse and threw it across the street like a frisbee to me i never thought i'd be able to love again
@Kyle_Lippert: DATING IN THE 1800s 1) Get telegram from Mae 2) Wait to respond. Don't be desperate 3) Get telegram that Mae died of dysentery while waiting
@kibblesmith: The genie sang that whole song about how he's gonna be Aladdin's best friend ever right in front of the monkey