@hilaryfairie: I keep hearing "Just be yourself" from everyone. I didn't realize so many people want me to go to prison :(
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@LaceyNycole: Him: How much do you love me? Me: A bit more than pizza. Him: Me: But not as much as coffee.
@just1fool: Beer:"You know what would be funny?" Me:"No. What?" Beer:"Really? Finish me and have four more then I'll ask again." Me:"Yes, sir."
@Reverend_Scott: Sometimes I ask myself, what would Aquaman do? So I sit in the bathtub and cry about how useless I am.