@weinerdog4life: I keep pushing the potato button on the microwave, but alas, no potato. :(
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@GoddessTitty: NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO SERVICE Waiter: ahem *points to sign* Me: oh that's fine, I'm not ordering anything
@WritePlay: *dog barks at absolutely everything, every time* Me: SHUT UP *dog barks at burglar, one time* Me: It's like he just knew there was danger
@caperbc75: First off I want to commend you for taking part in credit counselling. Now, under assets you wrote "like an onion". Can you clarify?
@daemonic3: Son? "Yes dad?" If they ever put me on my death bed... I want you to... "Yes?" Tell those idiots to put me on a life bed instead wtf