@Kali_Mura: I killed my twin because she wouldn't admit that she was the evil one.
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@QwertyJones3: Mankind is capable of unimaginable feats of engineering and yet the windows on the airplane never line up with the seats.
@TDeeRock: You know what Victoria's Secret is.. Over charging you for a tiny piece of fabric that can be pushed aside by a tongue.
@Sassafrantz: [first date] Him: You're amazing! I'm having a great time! Me: I will fight you for the rest of this pizza.
@RealSamHarwood: Unless you are literally the Dark Lord Voldemort then a snake is just not an acceptable pet dude