@Shock_Monster: I know a certain right hand that is going to be getting VERY lucky tonight...
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@sara_ashlynn: I broke a lightbulb, smashed artwork, splattered milk from cereal bowls across kitchen walls and knocked over candles. Fly is dead.
@jabbins: Left my car for maybe 15 minutes in front of the dorms and I come back to this. College man
@joejwest: HITMAN: Who's the target? ME: [slides photo across table] HITMAN: You..want me to kill Shrek? ME: Not Shrek [taps photo] his talkative horse
@Bill_Nye_tho: i just finished breaking bad. what happens to hanks minerals. I don't like loose ends man. what happened to the minerals