@1evilidiot: I know how to pronounce worcestershire until I see it written.
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@LuvPug: The best part of the Titanic is when Rose is holding onto Jack and she's all like, 'I'll never let go' and then she lets go.
@WarrenHolstein: Janay Rice says the elevator attack was all part of God's plan. God must not like her very much.
@BuckyIsotope: Sir, the children at the petting zoo are unhappy. They think our animals are lame *stares off into distance* We're gonna need a bigger goat
@girlontapas: Get a dog from the shelter for your kids and you're a hero but get a hobo from the shelter to babysit your kids and everyone gets all upset