@CanadianPitbull: I know why you wear your wedding ring on your left hand guys. Cause once you say "I do" your right hand is gonna be awful busy.
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@MUMSIEesq: ME: My husband says you use special traps that put the mice outside to play with their friends EXTERMINATOR [LOOKS AT HUSBAND]: umm, yeaahh
@brianbowman73: Sorry I called you an imbecile. I should've realized I would have to explain to you what that means.
@mean_crow: to the scum photoshopping bandanas on my wedding photos, STOP. my wife has a bad memory & is in tears, she thinks she married a bandana guy
@BuckyIsotope: OLD MAN: I fought in WWII ME: Oh yeah? What was your kill:death ratio OLD MAN: what ME: Can you rocket jump? OLD MAN: I wish Hitler had won