@fillthevacuum: I know you didn't sneeze. I said "God bless you" because your baby is ugly.
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@suntzufuntzu: The software tracking your browsing has fallen in love with you; it doesn't mind if you don't click the ads, it just hopes they please you.
@Nikky_Gin: Latino soap operas where no one seems to have locks on their doors and people burst in at odd hours demanding the truth
@Green_EyedMama: You're how old? *does quick math in head* Ok! I'm not old enough to be your mom ...lets do this! -justifying a bad decision with math
@Brentweets: Speed 3: Waitress has to keep talking about the day's specials or the entire restaurant explodes.