@DranoRaul: I learned two important lessons today. I can't remember the first lesson, but the second one is I have to start writing things down.
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@joeljeffrey: A man fought off a polar bear yesterday using only his cell phone... it was probably a blackberry. The bear was so disgusted he just left.
@david8hughes: Wife: Why is there a bouncy castle in the garden? Me out of breath with no shoes on: I'm not sure.
@FatherWithTwins: *young woman walks by Wife: Wow, she looks really good, don't you think? Me: NO WAY, I'M NOT GOING TO FALL FOR THAT