@taylortomlinson: I like horror movies because it's the only place insanely hot people are treated poorly
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@Cheeseboy22: I always cary a clump of my hair in my pocket so when people say, "I like your haircut", I can respond with, "Thanks. Here, have some."
@WheelTod: To avoid the risk of dangerous paradoxes I use my time machine only to skip, rewind & pause my TV shows; also saving $10/mo on renting a DVR