@ShittyComedian: I like how all these people are acting like they've never seen a naked 37 year old man fight 3 security guards at a mall food court before.
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@somelightcrying: [think of idiom] firing on all cylinders [post tweet w/ idiom + literal interpretation] mr. on all cylinders, ur fired [wait for 100+ faves]
@ChipKellysBalls: Next time you decide to complain about your problems, just remember, some guy out there has Snooki as his mom ...
@BruceForce: Some dude told me he's had 100 times more girls than me which made me laugh so much because 100 x 0 is still 0.