@ShesARealGenius: I like how Band-Aids come in 2 varieties: Stays on For a Second Before Falling Off or Needs WD-40 For Removal From Skin.
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@DannyZuker: I fear all this talk of llamas & dresses has distracted us from the important fact that there is video of Madonna falling off a stage.
@PaperWash: idea for haunted house: dimly lit grocery store sprinkled with people you haven't talked to since high school
@iGreenMonk: Every night I keep a pillow under my gun in case a murderer threatens me to a pillow fight.