@Nahdude83: I like making babies... Unsuccessfully, of course.
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@XplodingUnicorn: My daughters took turns tracing each other over and over with chalk. Now it looks like 25 children were murdered in my driveway.
@SteveDutzy: *logs on Facebook IT'S YOUR OLD HIGH SCHOOL BULLY'S BIRTHDAY TODAY! *logs off WAIT COME BACK! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD ABOUT YOUR EX'S ENGAGEMENT!
@Dishy2101: Car next to me in liquor store parking lot has a family sticker. She has SEVEN kids. I better get in there quick! She's gonna buy it all.