@aspaul: I like my sentences like I like my women: awkward but with good colon usage and regular periods.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheMichaelRock: My wife sent me to the store to buy shampoo, conditioner, lotion and condoms. I'm pretty sure the cashier thinks I'm making a girlfriend.
@dreadnaught69: *at a restaurant* Don't be awkward, don't be awkward Waitress: how's the food? Me: yes
@Brampersandon_: WIFE: I just bought toilet paper. How are we out already? ME: *hiding dog that I wrapped up like a mummy* it's a mystery I guess