@TEXASVETERAN: I like my women how I like my government: open and unprotected.
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@InternetHippo: BEN CARSON’S WIFE: Are you coming home for dinner BEN CARSON: Go to ben carson dot com and read my plan to come home for dinner
@TitaniumToplass: Just wrote "except for you, spiders >:(" on my Welcome mat so that should be the end of that
@hurlarious: Why doesn't every mistake in real life I make have a squiggly red line underneath it?