@lejessica: I like to have a glass of water around to make sure there aren't any dinosaurs approaching.
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@TheToddWilliams: [Scientific Conference] Scientist 1: So science? Scientist 2: *nodding* Science.
@dave_cactus: Why stop at clocks? I set my stapler forward an hour too. Told my shoes it's Tuesday. My car still thinks it's 1987.
@bourgeoisalien: I can't stop coughing. Think I'll go see a movie in a crowded theater while slowly eating a bag of bone-dry popcorn.