@dreamthievin: I like to imagine Supreme Court is just like regular court but with tomatoes and sour cream.
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@MooseAllain: In a hotel room. The dog's growling and whimpering. My wife's worried the neighbours will think we're having sex.
@Brianhopecomedy: The most stressful part of my day is when my 5 year old shows me what he made in Arts & Crafts and I have to guess what it is.
@tat2dsoccermom: So, this co-worker stated that she makes ice cubes with her leftover alcohol. I'm confused. What's leftover alcohol?
@WheelTod: Remember kids -- it may be illegal to text and drive; but you can still lawfully handwrite someone a heartfelt letter at 50mph.