@poutinesmoothie: I like to sing Mambo No. 5 but replace the names of the women with various types of cheese.
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@Reverend_Scott: COP: PUT YOUR HANDS UP OCTOPUS: They're tentacles COP: OK PUT ALL 8 TENTACLES UP OCTOPUS: Two are my legs, dude COP: Just go. I give up.
@truegritrumble: ME:I'm a writer HER:What have you written? ME:A few books, but you wouldn't have heard of them HER:Try me ME:They go to a different school
@Coops_Bradley: That's a really big gun in your pants. And that's how you get out of a speeding ticket.
@AndrewChamings: priest: if anyone here has any reason why these two should not be married speak now or—- yelling from the back: —SHE DRINKS WATER FROM A MUG