@ohJuliatweets: I like Triscuits because sometimes you just want to eat a wicker basket.
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@TheMichaelRock: Me: Wanna role play? Wife: Sure ;) Me: You be the chef/waitress and I'll be the custom..WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!
@huntigula: "Swimming is dangerous, so I wear floaties on my arms for safety!" [cut to me floating face-down in a pool with only my arms above water]
@LeviathanPride: Does North Korea remember what happened the last time a country attacked Hawaii?
@withanewname: Yoga? No thank you. I'll download an app to my phone so I don't have to stretch for the remote.