@Crunch11b: I live 30 feet from my mother-in-law, Hell holds no surprises.
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@MatCro: [break-in] BURGLAR: [cracks safe] COP: Not so fast, kiddo BURGLAR: [cracks safe more slowly]
@ariscott: Please God, let the weather be nice for my picnic. There are 7 billion people on this planet. Many starving. Please hear my picnic prayer.
@boring_as_heck: Shit. Damn it. A bumper sticker just changed my entire worldview, again. This happens like 3 times a day.
@lolajxx: Anyone who has to spend more than 2 mins at an ATM is obvilously sending a text to Optimus Prime