@DanLaMorte: I look at beautiful girls the same way I look at traffic. Meaning that I'm stuck and going nowhere with them
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@pleatedjeans: OMINOUS CHANTING *pentagram starts to glow* YES! RISE DARK LORD! RISE! *Satan tosses pillow through portal* UNGH 5 MORE MINUTES!!!
@prozdkp: Mitt Romney dissing Trump is like when an anime villain from the previous arc teams up to help stop the new billion times more evil villain
@McKnightyBoo: Sorry I yelled: BLESS YOU and handed you a tissue after you told me you loved me Blow your nose, it will pass
@radtoria: "Penguins mate for life. Isn't that romantic?" You open your mouth to answer but I spit my chewed up cake into it. "You're my penguin."