@TjSmooth0: I lost an ibuprofen under my dresser a week ago and now I'm worried the spiders are coming after me with no headaches and renewed vigor.
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@juskewitch: The most troubling examples of sexism, homophobia and racism that I've ever heard are things I've said driving on the New Jersey Turnpike.
@iGreenMonk: I hate Walmart. The men's bathroom doesn't have any urninals! Just a bunch of women screaming telling me to get out
@pizzajaynow: Can someone help me figure out how much water I need to add to this baby powder in order to make a baby?
@flashember: walk up to the mightiest oak in the forest and punch it. now laugh as you climb into its branches to let the other trees know you're insane