@SamTR7: I lost my phone and it's on silent. Man! I should've listened to Beyonce.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@BlackCatBettie: If you have a horse and you didn't name it Edgar Allan Pony, we can't be friends.
@StellaGMaddox: My daughter wrote, "I will see you every day of our lives," on my Mother's Day card, so I guess we've resorted to threats now.
@SirEviscerate: Are you eating Jell-O? Cow: "Yeah." You know what gelatin is made from, right? Cow: "No, what?" Uh. Rainbows. Enjoy, buddy.
@Cain_Unable: -"I hear the Israeli PM isn't too worried about that latest hack because.." -"Please don't" -"...Benjamin's Not on Yahoo" -"I'm leaving you"