@TheGayFlash: I love how people say they're "expecting" a baby, as though it might be something else, like a penguin or a lawnmower.
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@withanewname: [trick or treating] "Oh, what a cute little…what's she doing?" Me: potty training. "In my pumpkin?!" Me: She likes the heated seat.
@SortaBad: *guy shows me his Chinese character tattoo* "It means wisdom" *I show him a Batman BandAid on my arm* "It means I was brave at the doctor"
@lecalabara: I was holding the door for an Asian guy and he said "sank you." So I punched him. Cant believe that he brought up Pearl Harbor lke that