@OhMattyBoy: I love the people in parking lots with "free kittens" signs because I too feel that kittens shouldn't be oppressed.
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@Dutch_50: Doctor: You have acute alcoholism. Me: Thanks, but let me tell you it's not very cute in the morning.
@shawnspree: Smile and the world smiles with you. Laugh and the world wants you to stop looking at your phone and drive.
@morebees: when someone says 'your flys down' it implies that 1) i have a fly and 2) hes having a bad day