@SashaBrenner: I love the smell of relapse in the morning
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@ComedicBust: Does anyone know the life span of a honey baked ham? Please say 6 months. Never mind, I'm just gonna pretend everything's going to be ok.
@SassyTexasGal: Sees cute guy in the parking. Drops something so I can bend over & do the sexy hair flip. Forgets I have short hair. He sees me as seizing.
@Cyd10e: 9 year-old attempts to follow a recipe: "It says here to separate the eggs. How far apart do they have to be?"