@BruceForce: I love the way everyone who uses hand sanitizer looks like they're hatching some kind of evil plan.
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@RodneyH42: A study shows that 50% of adults would fail an 8th grade math exam The other 40% of us would rock that shit
@Jen_says_nah: Spoiler alert for the lady in this line, repeatedly asking her newborn 'what's wrong?' Its not gonna answer ya.
@_ElvishPresley_: Me: I'm sort of a chicken magnet Him: Don't you mean chick magn- *sounds of distant bawk-bawking* Me: We have to go NOW