@AnkCoupleTO: I made my will yesterday and had to make my lawyer the beneficiary because my estate will just about cover his bill
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@ScottLinnen: Airport moving sidewalks are great for when you only want to feel like George Jetson for 10 seconds before you're back to Fred Flintstone.
@Spaziotwat: I can finish The Times' crossword in under five minutes but I struggle to eat the whole paper
@seamusmckracken: If you're hitting the gas every time she tries to open the passenger side door, remember, the 8th time is always the funniest.
@Jailene_LaChona: Being fluent in Spanish is all fun and games until you’re put in a professional setting and all you know is Spanish del rancho