@TheBoydP: I may be getting old but not “doesn’t know what day of the week it is” old. I can tell by which day I open on my daily pill organizer.
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@ThoughtOtter: [blind date] OK don't let her know you're a remote control "Your eyes are beau- *sinks into seat crevice, lost for weeks* DAMMIT NOT AGAIN
@Flattliner: Whoever said that blood is thicker than water is plainly a) Fond of stating the obvious, and b) Not a member of my family.