@BadMikeyBad: I may be weird, but everyone needs a buddy who will show up at 2 a.m. and help get the dead zebra out of the septic tank without judging you
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@AustinSommer: If you spin an oriental person around until they get dizzy, do they become disoriented? #LifeQuestions
@juliussharpe: Arthur Miller underratedly sucked at naming characters. "Biff"?? "Happy"?? Dude, take five more minutes.
@QwertyJones3: The woman who sits next to me at work just told someone she's surrounded by idiots. I feel bad for her.