@vexroid: I may not be book smart or street smart and I may not have much common sense and I'm really not sure where I was going with this.
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@WilliamRodgers: Me: Happy Easter! Taylor Swift: I hate Easter! It's all a lie! Me: The Jesus thing? Taylor Swift: Ya... Men don't come back after 3 Days!
@_ElvishPresley_: [1st day as a Transformer] GAS STATION ATTENDEE: And your total comes to $43,789.95 ME: (becomes a Decepticon)
@Pork_Chop_Hair: (6yo son sweetly tracing my face with his fingers at bedtime) 6: Just be still, Momma. I'm pretending to shave off your eyebrows.