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@nPhelendriqal: I mean, I'm smart, but I'm no Alfred Einstein.
@SteveSuckington: "DAAAAAAAD!! LOKI KEEPS STEALING MY THUNDER!!"
@NikiWithIssues: Stretching and yawning at the same time might not look so sexy but it looks like you're a Pokemon evolving so that's cool.
@thatguyJA: My minivan has this cool anti-theft system called its a minivan
@Zwolf666: My neighbor's 13-month old only has four teeth. She's way too young to being doing that much meth.
@weinerdog4life: How to make friends: Put your clothes on backwards so people don't notice you walking up to them.