@abbycohenwl: I moved to LA with nothing but the shirt on my back. No pants & I couldn't figure out how to get the shirt on my front. Soon I was jailed
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@Sir_Strange: "Oh my god, you've gotten so fat! Want me to make you something to eat?" - my mother
@iGreenMonk: Conversation between Adam and Eve must have been difficult at times because they had nobody to talk about.
@mikeleffingwell: My daughter told me she wants to be a secret agent. Based on that alone, I don't think she'd be a good secret agent.
@ojedge: Guys what shall we call thing that impedes movement? GUY NAMED BARRY: "How about a barry?" GUY NAMED BARRY BARRY: "How about a barrier?"