@MEQ_777: I need a bad ass dress for Friday night. Anybody know where I can find a Forever 41?
@TylerLinkin: Bacon causes cancer.
Canadian bacon apologizes.
@EJGomez: me: goodnight moon
moon: i have a boyfriend
@ieatanddrink: Oh OK thanks for the tip, I was actually planning on letting the bed bugs bite but good call
@jctwritesstuff: Me: *tied up*
Guy: *hits my kneecap*
M: I'm not a rat!
G: Bring in her sworn enemy!
G2: *tosses Rubik's Cube at me*
M: Oh god no! I'll talk!
@robdelaney: Michael Jackson would be 54 today if he hadn't hired such a gifted nap specialist.