@pakalupapito: i need a hug(e amount of cash money)
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@The_MartiniGirl: The sampler tester at the liquor store told me to stop coming back every hour in a disguise.
@MattMcElaney: Cashier's playing dumb cause I said "venti" at a non-Starbucks. You know what I mean, dude, just point me to the biggest dildo you guys got.
@causticbob: I went for a job interview. The bloke asked, "Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?" "Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied
@Juven_Naidoo: Couch: $300 TV: $1000 Chips: $3. The look on your face when you don't have electricity: Priceless