@eliserose5: I need some sugar. Not the stupid kind that gives you mono, but the good kind that gives you diabetes.
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@ddsmidt: People with house arrest ankle bracelets get so touchy when you compare them to a dog's invisible fence.
@SamuelHLowe: How many "I hate you, you insensitive asshole" equals one "I love you"? Please say 57.
@QwertyJones3: The only thing worse than finding a hair in your food is realizing that the person who prepared it has a bald head.