@jake_lach: I need to lay off the caffeine. My neighbor keeps complaining that I'm tackling her much more than usual
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@13spencer: I work in the entertainment industry, so the only way I could lie more is if I worked in politics.
@JaneBadall: My son just referred to a beaver as a "wood-eater". So I mulled it over in my mind for a bit and it would seem he's correct on two levels.
@darinlovesbacon: I'm not one to give parenting advice, but kids are a lot less likely to fight you on eating dinner if you don't give them lunch or breakfast
@ericsshadow: [undercover FBI agent steps out of his surveillance van, knocks on my front door] do you ever stop eating?