@mishakey: I never close my eyes in the shower because that's how murderers know when to show up and kill you.
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@Jake_Vig: ALIEN: You Earthlings have many technological advances. How do you predict the weather? ME: We pull a rodent out of a box.
@ProudFFAalumni: woke up just in time to push my cat off the bed before he threw up. today is going to be magical.