@koalaslament: I never know what to do when someone tries to fist bump me, so I just slowly put their fist in my mouth
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@UncleDuke1969: “Son, we have to talk.” “What is it, Dad?” “You were adopted.” “Oh my god… Really?!?” “Yup. Get ready. They’re picking you up in an hour.”
@Kali_Mura: I'm beginning to suspect that my boyfriend is not really a ninja & that he moved out nine month ago.
@4boding: My weekly retreat is simple: driving alone down country roads for a couple of hours with tunes cranked up and singing loudly to livestock.