@Loli_Sug: I never point out when someone's zipper is down. I just zip it up for them.
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@wittwitbarista: In Seattle, there's a code that states when two people are walking towards each other, the one with the bigger coffee cup passes first.
@robdelaney: Take 1/5th the $ car insurance companies spend on advertising, apply it to health care, and everyone can have golden organs and never die.
@FloodyHippie: You don't need to put "narcissist" in your bio. This is twitter, that shit goes without saying.