@thagr8short1: I never try to make guests feel at home. If they wanted to feel at home, they should have stayed there.
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@jus4golf: Found my first gray pubic hair. The people in line with me at the market were not nearly as impressed as I was.
@anthonyzach: Neighbours described the United Kingdom as a "quiet, well-mannered country" that "kept itself to itself".
@jergarl: 87% of my day is spent remembering my kids names and my anniversary and stuff and the other 57% is trying to do math.
@Calliejacobson: So apparently in a job interview, if the interviewer asks you to choose one word that describes you, the correct answer is not fergalicious.